Hello beautiful people
How have you been? It’s been a while hasn’t it!
How’s your self talk? Not a question you get asked often I expect. I’m not sure I would of really understood the question if I was asked years ago.
You may have watched the film ‘Pretty Woman’ and I don’t even want to know how old it is now, but there is a line in the film where the woman says to the millionaire that she falls in love with
“Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to believe the bad stuff than the good stuff” or words to that effect.
It really struck me all those years ago how true it was but even still, knowing it and doing something about it seemed so far apart. I seemed to go through life just taking on whatever negativity I spoke over myself (which was a lot) and anything negative other people said to me. I’m guessing that Im not the only one who felt/feels like that.
So what I want to share with you is WHAT has changed and HOW has it changed?
In simple terms I have had a complete shift in the way I think about myself which in turn has shifted the way I see others, killing two birds with one stone I guess.
It wasn’t until I started coming to Eastgate (the church we have been coming to for about 6 years) that I noticed a difference in the way people spoke about each other and themselves. It was becoming more and more apparent that the way I was used to talking about myself was neither good nor healthy.
Week after week I was hearing about God loving me exactly the way I was because He had created a one off in me and that there would never be another like me or that could do what He had created me to do/be. That is the case for each and every one of us, we are all uniquely made with a unique purpose, no matter how hard you find that to believe, it really is the truth.
So bit by bit I started trying to believe what God was saying about me and to be honest it was really difficult. When you have lived your life believing the worst about yourself its a tough habit to break. I started by making good declarations to myself like ‘you are a good person’ and ‘you are intelligent’ and if the thought of you saying those things to yourself makes you feel uncomfortable its a good sign that you don’t have a very good view of yourself either. As I started saying them I was cringing as they sounded so up myself but as time has gone on I have realised that putting myself down or not giving myself credit for who I am and what I have achieved is actually false humility and doesn’t serve anyone, least of all me. All it actually does is steal from me and prevent me from being and doing the best I can be/do.
By focusing on the things that I like about me and accepting compliments when they are given it’s not only changing the way I feel about myself in a good way but it has also helped me to see the good in others, it’s infectious! I used to find it all too easy to find fault in other people and judge them but I am becoming much more prone to seeing the good in people and the beauty in them. This is not something I have now achieved but more of a continual learning process. It definitely makes for a happier me and will make for a happier you.
Being around people who are prone to seeing the best in you in so very helpful. We tend to become what we focus on, so the more you focus on the good stuff the better you will feel and having people that help that journey is priceless. As I’ve said before really think about the kind of people you are surrounding yourself with.
I have been privileged enough to have some great input by a couple called Steve and Wendy Backlund who came to our church but also have a great online presence with so much encouragement about how to change your life by what you speak. http://www.ignitinghope.com
I cannot encourage you enough to start thinking about the way you self talk. The change for me has been huge, I am experiencing freedom that I didn’t even know was possible and I am desperate to see others walking in that freedom. Im not saying that I never have a bad thought or that I don’t struggle with situations and feelings at times because I absolutely do but I also have a new way of looking at and thinking about things, like everything in life it’s learning process.
I really hope this post has been an encouragement and inspiration to you to think about the way you talk to yourself.
I would so like to hear from you.
With much love